Be Free Too

 

                                                        THE ROAD TO FREEDOM.

Two roads diverged in a wood and I—I took the one less traveled by.  And that has made all the difference.”                    Robert Frost

What is “freedom?” The simplest definition is this;  freedom is the ability to live your l life in your own way. Being “free,” by that definition, is rare. It’s something most people only dream of and few attain. Imagine being able to to escape the 9 to 5 grind. To free yourself from destructive relationships and dead end jobs.

I did it.  You can do it.  And you can start today.  You already have all the tools you need but don’t know  you have them.  In  the next few pages I’lll tell you how I became free to live my life in my own way.  I’lll give you the titles of the books that helped me find that freedom.  I’ll share with you some antic dotes and advice.  And above all, I’ll  encourage you in the most important quest of your life.  The quest to live your life in your own way.

BLIND LUCK BEATS SKILL ANJD DARING NINE TIMES OUT OF TEN

And I have always been a very lucky man.  I was fortunate to have grown up in a small town in Iowa.   My parents weren’t rich or famous. But they, and the community in which I lived, taught me that hard work and thrift were good things.  In fact, hard work and thrift are the basis of every ones independence. (Read the classic little book, “The richest Man In Babylon.)  I struggled thru high school but eventually earned a Ph.D from a real University and so I’ve read a lot of books. But it was years later that I discovered the book that changed my life and made me a free man.

It was 1975. The year Gerald Ford took over from a Water Gate disgraced Richard Nixon.  The Honda Civic hit the market and coincidentally Bruce Springsteen released “Born to Run.”  Giorgio Armani established the company that still bears his name and continues to clean out your wallet.  “One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest” won best picture. Saigon fell and television images of the last remaining Americans being helicopterd off the US embassy roof signaled the end  and loss of the Vietnam War.

A beautiful red head (who fueled my imagination) walked into my office one afternoon. She threw a book down on my desk and said, “Here, I think you should read this.”  The book was Harry Browne’s HOW I FOUND FREEDOM IN AN UNFREE WORLD. First published in 1973, I had never heard of the book.  I shoved it in my brief case and promised her I’d read it.  She smiled and swayed out of my office.

The richness of my imagination was exceeded only by the number of mid level administrators working at the San Diego Community College. I was one of them.  To most of my colleagues I had a perfect life.  A decent paying job, a home in the suburbs, a beautiful wife (whose only flaw was having married me,)  a Porsche convertible, a golden retriever, money in the bank, a lawn mower, and a trash can to put out every Thursday. My Midwest values of thrift, hard work, and a college education had delivered “the good life.”

The problem was, as good as that life might have seemed to others, it didn’t work for me. I was living somebody else’s idea of a perfect life. The guy I saw in the mirror each morning wasn’t me. I loved my wife. But she only wanted to stay at home, watch TV and bake cookies. I wanted to see the world.  But I felt locked in. Trapped. I WAS BORED TO DEATH! But I had no idea what to do about it or how to do it. As in the words to what may have been an old song or poem, “I leave home each morning, turn right to the office on Elm street I go. But I longingly look left to who knows?  Left or right at Elm Street?  It’s a decision I make every day.  And I don’t know which takes the more courage…the staying or running away.”

Well, as the old saying goes, “when the pupil is ready the teacher arrives.” The teacher was Harry Browne. I took the book home and read it.  I mean, I read the entire book cover to cover without stopping. I finished the book about one in the morning. I looked over at the beautiful sleeping wife and out the window at Thursday mornings trash can. I knew without the slightest doubt the life I was living was about to change.

And so it was. Within six months I said goodbye to the perfect job, the perfect wife, the golden retriever, the perfect house. Cruel? Selfish? Hey, My wife admitted that she secretly longed for a man who would sit around in his t-shirt, drink beer, watch TV and gobble down her cookies. So I bought her a condo, gave her the TV and half the savings and the dog. Did I mention she was a former Playboy Bunny with a Masters Degree in Home Economics? I’m not making this up. Believe me, within a few months I was replaced. It didn’t take her long to find a guy who would put out the trash on Thursday morning. I kept the Porsche but realized I could live without it. From that moment on I was a free man.  I was free to live my life in my own way. I turned left on Elm Street.  It was exciting. It was terrifying. But there was no going back.

Amazing. A few years later the ex wife left the guy in the T-shirt and started writing and publishing cookbooks. She turned left on Elm Street too.

IT CAN’T BE THAT EASY. 

“Now wait just a minute,” I can hear you saying “It can’t be that easy.  How about money?  What about commitments? Not to mention social obligations.  What will people think?  How will I make a living? Where will I live?”  Those questions, you see, are exactly the reasons, you, yes you, are probably not free. You’re waiting for someone or some thing to set you free. You’re looking for that “get out of jail free card.” (It’s already in your pocket but it isn’t free.)

WORDS OF WISDOM.  

 After countless meals in Chinese restaurants I’ve come across only 3 fortunes I found worth keeping.  They’re pertinent.  1. “Don’t wait for your ship to come in, swim out to it.” (My friend, wishing is not a strategy. YOU must take action if you are to be free.)  2. “Finding ones self in an uncomfortable situation is usually voluntary.”  (You alone hold the key to the chains that bind.)  3. (You’ll have to wait until the end of my story.)

BORN FREE ISN’T JUST A STORY ABOUT LIONS.  

The fact is YOU WERE BORN FREE.  But little by little YOU traded that freedom away.  Your peers, your teachers, your community, your parents, and Madison Avenue combined to convince you that you should be someone THEY wanted you to be.  This desire to mold you into something you are not may be particularly true of your mate, lover, or spouse, or boss. But what THEY want you to be may not be the person YOU want to be. If you’re already self actualized and never feel conflicted then go back to the Intro and enjoy the poems and pictures.  If not, read on.

“WE DECLARE THESE TRUTHS TO BE SELF EVIDENT.”  

 As my first act of freedom I simply declared myself free. This is THE key point in your quest for freedom and the one most often not understood. ONLY YOU HAVE THE POWER TO MAKE YOURSELF FREE. It requires no one else’s approval or permission.  No joint effort on the part of some committee.  No mass community campaign. That’s the beauty of the thing.  It only requires something you already have.
You.

FREEDOM MAY NOT BE FOR YOU. 

Beware.  Freedom is not a universal desire. Freedom doesn’t work for everyone.  In fact, it doesn’t  work for most people. That’s why some guy with a 9-5 job was happy to hook up with my ex-wife, walk the dog, mow the lawn, and put the trash out on Thursday. Somebody took over my job and probably still sits in that cubicle.  As to why they do it you might want to read Erich Fromm’s “Escape From Freedom.” It explains that “Unfree World” part of Harry Browne’s book.  And if freedom isn’t for you, well, that’s ok as long as it’s YOUR choice.  (Don’t worry about remembering the titles of these books right now. All the books I’m going to mention are listed at the end of my story and all are available as inexpensive paperbacks at Amazon.com)

FREEDOM–THE MAIN PITFALL.  

It took a few months but gradually I divested myself of all the things that had held me prisoner. I vividly remember the first morning I awoke and realized I was a free man.  The reality of it was frightening.  I had the rest of my life ahead of me to pretty much do with as I chose  AND NOBODY BUT MYSELF TO BLAME IF I SCREWED IT UP!  Now that is an awsome responsibility.  The fact is, the un-free person relishes the thought that he or she has someone else to blame for their own bad decisions, mis- steps, mistakes, and mishaps.  The willingness to take responsibility for one’s own life  is the esential second step on your road to freedom. It’s also the cure for most of the moral and financial problems facing the USA and much of the world today. (More on that later.)

From time to time since 1975 I’ve  fallen off the “freedom wagon” and found myself once again at the wrong career, or in the wrong relationship, or bogged down with useless possessions. But I was able to correct those mistakes because I knew I could do it.  I knew I could do it because I had done it that very first time.  It didn’t just make it easier, it made it inevitable. And re-reading Browne’s book from time to time was essential.

DEADLINES AND COMMITMENTS.  

Perhaps there are just so many obligations or “traps” as Harry Browne calls them, that you feel overwhelmed. Remember, “The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.”  No mater how daunting this may seem, you can do it.  While in high school I landed a part-time job in an auto body repair shop.  I’ll never forget my first task.  A farmer brought in this enormous old pick to be painted.   My job was to sand the entire truck in preparation for painting.  I was overwhelmed.  So much truck!  The boss noticed my frustration.  He walked over to me and said, “Son, stop looking at the whole truck.  Just start with the first fender and keep going.  Pretty soon it will be all sanded.”  He was right. Life by the inch is a cinch. Attain your freedom inthe same way.

WHAT TO LEAVE IN–WHAT TO LEAVE OUT.

Don’t worry about suddenly being able to do only those things you want to do. You may have been held prisoner for so long you don’t even know just what you want to do.  So start by just working on eliminating those things in your life that you KNOW FOR CERTAIN you don’t want to do.  And the sooner you eliminate them the less costly that elimination will be.

There’s a price to be paid for every distasteful obligation you manage to shed. Suppose you really hate your every Friday night commitment to get together with “the gang.”  Just stop doing it.  The price you’ll pay may be the disdain or outright resentment of “the gang.”  The reward will be that your Friday nights are now free to do with as you choose. And that might include still getting together with the Friday night gang, but only when YOU want to.  Start on the small things and work up to the big ones.

THE BIG ONES.

Ending a marriage, kicking the kids out of the nest, finding a new job, moving to a new town are big moves.  YOU CAN DO THIS.  The price may be high.  Alimony.   Child support.  Temporary loss of income.  Occasional regret. But occasional regret is easier than constant frustration.  And the sooner the price is paid the less that price will be.

This fact is best illustrated by the story of the woman who goes to her attorney and says, “I’ve only been married one year but all ready I hate my husband and I’m going to kill him.”  “My God”, says the attorney. “Don’t do it.  At best you’ll get twenty years in  prison for manslaughter.” Years later that same attorney is invited to the woman’s twentieth wedding anniversary.  As the evening is drawing to a close the attorney notices his friend standing out on the balcony all alone and sobbing.  “What’s the problem,” asks the attorney.  The woman turns to her attorney and says, “Had I killed him twenty years ago, tonight I’d be a free woman.”  (And had she divorced him after that first year, before the kids and all the community property came into existence her/his alimony would have been affordable.)

STUFF

Divesting  yourself of things that don’t bring you happiness is always a good idea. This is particularly true of “stuff.”  You know, all those possessions both large and small that we’ve acquired over the years.  “Stuff” we needed.  “Stuff” we just had to have.  The “stuff” of garage sales. Walk into any Wal-Mart and look around.  The world is full of stuff you do not need. And every time you buy some of it another barnacle is added to your freedom ship. In the words of an old cowboy friend in Wyoming, “Never buy anything you’re better off living without.”  (And if you’re better off living without it…why are you buying it?) Worse, most people buy things they don’t need on credit. Thus, they spend their lives paying off a credit card full of charges they didn’t need to make.

THE WORLD IS FULL OF WARDENS

Beware!  The world is also full of people who think their freedom is dependent upon you sacrificing yours.  These people are not free because they’re busy supervising you.  This is most often true of demanding mates, lovers, spouses, and your boss. These people spend their entire lives trying to control the behavior of you and others. Funny. This means the Warden is perhaps the least free person in the prison.  Click on “Advice to myself” for a more detailed discussion of this key point.

WHAT BOX?

Perhaps you’re thinking this all sounds like that old admonishment “think outside the box.”  Wrong!  It’s not a matter of thinking out side the box. The point is, THERE IS NO BOX.  When you wake up tomorrow morning say to yourself, THERE IS NO BOX. Hold that thought all day.  It will help you see all the boxes in which you’ve placed yourself only exist because you put yourself in them. 

ARE WE THERE YET? 

How will you know you’ve attained freedom?  Simple.  A free person finds themselves constantly choosing between equally attractive alternatives.  Think about that. If you have to decide, do I go out to dinner with my spouses relatives, whom I hate, or refuse to go and thus endure my spouses wrath for the next week, you, my friend, are not a free person. You are choosing between equally UNATTRACTIVE alternatives. Heads you lose, tails you lose.

Choosing between equally ATTRACTIVE alternatives is the whole idea. It’s the single most important concept to be learned.  An example of equally attractive alternatives might be something as simple as,  “do I order  pizza delivered and curl up with a good book (or my mate) or do I go out to my favorite little  French cafe?”  Flip a coin.  It’s win/win.

CAUSES, ORGANIZATIONS, AND AFFILIATIONS

For the most part I avoid causes, organizations, and affiliations.  My cause has been and remains the pursuit of my INDIVDUAL freedom.  My freedom is not contingent upon the actions of others.  Remember.  Your freedom is only contingent upon you.  People set out on causes are usually trying to change the world.  I don’t need to change the world.  I only need to change MY world.

RELIGION

It’s hard to understand how a hummingbird can migrate all the way from Mexico to my home in Jackson Hole. God’s will? Nature? Some grander scheme?  My best guess about the whole thing is, who knows?  As someone once said when asked if they believed in ghosts, “Of course not!  But I wouldn’t do anything to piss them off.” 

It’s not that I have trouble with the concept of a higher being.  It’s when that concept of a higher being gets codified into an organized religion that problems begin.  So, for the most part I distrust “Religion.”  It can lead to all sorts of group think.  In fact, most of the conflicts in the world today can be traced to religion. Few wars are now fought over territory. (Well, maybe the Russians are at it again.)  But radical muslims don’t recognize boundaries. They  fight over a desire to propagate their  religious belief.

POLITICS

The ultimate group think. Politics result in being labeled.  I have many Liberal friends, many Conservative friends, many “middle of the roaders.” I seldom vote because I distrust politicians. And nothing encourages a politician like voting for him/her.  I don’t believe the government is the cause or the solution of our problems. WE are the cause AND the solution. Therefore I believe in minimal government. I guess that makes me a Libertarian.  As was Harry Browne.  (Remember him?  He’s the guy who wrote the book you’re going to get from Amazon.com.)    In fact, I’ve only voted three times in my life.

My first vote was for George McGovern, my second for W,  and my last vote was for Bob Barr (Libertarian.)  Quite an evolution. Many of my friends in both political camps accused me of throwing away my vote by voting for a third party candidate with “no chance” of being elected. My response? You throw away your vote if you don’t vote for the candidate you WANT to win. And you throw away your life if you’re living someone else’s.

TRUTHS MY FATHER TOLD ME

It was almost impossible to grow up in Iowa in the fifties and sixties without being aginst big goverment. Iowa WAS at that time THE Heartland and a long way from Washington, D.C.  Hell, we thought Indiana was on the East coast. In fact, nobody from Iowa had actually ever met anybody from Indiana.  My father taught me many valuable, often conservative, lessons.  They usually came in the form of an old saying which was slightly twisted or one he made up but convinced me  it was an old saying.  For example he would often say, “Always look a gift horse in the mouth.”  Excuse me?   Well, it took years and years for that lesson to finally set in.  (The most powerful word in advertising remains the word “free.”)

Another favorite was, “There are only two ways to deal with a woman and nobody knows either one of em.”  Again, years and years and  and still I forget.   Speaking of women, he also warned me to “never own anything that eats or has to be painted.”   But I stray.  Back to politics and the gift horse.   There ain’t one.  Period.  Tarp money?  Stimulus money? Universal health care?   Listen, the trouble with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money. And if capitalism is the unequal distribution of wealth, then communism is the equal distribution of misery. I know this for a fact. I’ve been to Russia, China, and Cuba.

A BOX FULL OF PUPPIES

 So how did I go from liberal to conservative to libertarian?  Ever hear that  the old saying, “If you’re 20 and aren’t a liberal you don’t have a heart and if you’re 50 and aren’t a conservative you don’t have a brain?”  To which I would add, and if you’re 60 and haven’t become a libertarian you’re not using your brain. My favorite, however, is the story about the little boy outside the grocery store with a box of puppies.  Attached to the box was a sign that read, “Democrat puppies $5”  Two weeks later a man comes to the grocery store and notices the little boy and the puppies are still there but now the sign reads, “republican puppies $5.”  And one week later the sign reads “libertarian puppies $5.” “What happened?” asked the man.  “Two weeks ago they were democrats.   Then republicans.  Now libertarians.”    The little boy simply replied,  “Now they have their eyes open.”

I don’t trust politicians because, for the most part, what they say and what they do are usually in contradiction.  Lincoln is generally considered the greatest  president. So I will refer to him as my mentor and guide on things political.   I will list but a few quotes attributed to Lincoln.  If this list sounds like what any other politician is doing, well, you’re smoking better stuff than I’ve ever tried.

1. You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift.
2. You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong.
3. You cannot help the poor man by destroying the rich.
4. You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred.
5. You cannot build character and courage by taking away man’s initiative and independence.
6. You cannot help small men by tearing down big men.  (Sorry ladies.)
7. You cannot lift the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer.
8. You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than your income.
9. You cannot establish security on borrowed money.
10. You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they will not do for themselves.

I am aware that it is generally accepted that these things were never actually said by Lincoln.  In fact they were probably said by a Presbyterian minister named William Boetcker.  Ok, maybe Lincoln didn’t say them.  But he should have.  And politicians should take them to heart. As should everyone who still values their freedom.

Think about it.  These ten things that you “cannot do” are the exact things government tries TO DO! In fact, the political spectrum today can be divided into two groups.  On one side, those who feel the government is the solution to all their problems.  On the other, millions of citizens who are certain the government is the cause of all their problems. I repeat. Politicians are not the problem. Voters are the problem. Think your senator or congress person is an idiot? Hey, the majority voted for him/her.

MY OLD MAN AGAIN.           That reminds me.  My father used to claim that “All things can be divided into two groups.”  As his first example he would site the fact that all people can be divided into two groups as regards this claim of “two-ness.” Those who believe all things can be divided into two groups and those who don’t.”  He also had a clever example of “invisible.”  It was a bladeless knife with no handle.  (I learned early on not to argue with my father.)

And we’re all familiar with that list of the three greatest lies. There are a few variations but my favorites are, 1, I’ll do it first thing Monday morning. 2, the checks in the mail, and 3, I promise I won’t… Now we can add a forth.  It’s “Hi, I’m from the government.  I’m here to help you.”  Fact is, all I want the government to do is leave me alone.  Of course, that’s the one thing they cannot do. They are in the business of controlling other peoples lives.

So why, you ask, would I want the government to “leave me alone.”   I ask you honestly,  what is it that you want the government to do FOR YOU that you can not do better FOR YOURSELF?  Ok, protect our borders. Good example.  The last time I returned from Costa Rica to Miami I had to show my passport and clear customs.  As I was doing that hundreds of illegals were streaming across our southern border unimpeded.   As an example, go to any Home Depot at eight in the morning, count all the illegal immigrants standing around looking for work, and you decide how well the government is doing at protecting our borders.

The government builds roads and infrastructure you say.  Agreed.  But the truth is the government only collects taxes to pay for that construction.  The vast majority of infrastructure construction is done by the private sector.  Thank God.  Imagine our free way system if it were built and maintained by those same city workers that take care of our streets.  Hitting that pothole at 35 is bad enough.  Imagine hitting it on the freeway at 75.

Yes, the government should arrest and detain criminals.  And they do by the hundreds of thousands.  In the meantime, your first line of defense should be that you protect yourself from these villains.  Have a home security system, lock your doors, and avoid the “bad” part of town.  If you are raped or mugged the police MAY catch your assailant and a Judge MAY lock the culprit away, but you will still have been raped and your possessions will still be gone. Learn to depend first and foremost on YOU.

A word of advice on that home security system.  Advertise that you have one with signs and warnings.  I’M reminded of that famous scene from “Dr. Strangelove” when the President and his advisors are startled when they first learn the Russians have a ‘doomsday device’ which is set to trigger thousands of nuclear bombs in case they are attacked by the US.  Seems they were keeping it secret.  If you have a doomsday device as a deterrent isn’t it a good idea to let everybody know about it?

And speaking of “Dr. Strangelove,” The government should provide a military.  And they do.  In fact, regardless of your take on our various wars and “incursions” it is still the one thing the government used to do well. That’s why we don’t all speak German or Japanese or worship in a Mosque. But what is the military?  The best the government can hope to do is recruit and train us civilians.  Thus, each soldier is actually a citizen soldier.  And in combat that platoon on the front line has only themselves for support.  Washington is a long way away.  (Thankfully.)

JUSTICE FOR ALL AND A LEVEL PLAYING FIELD

On thing the governement must do is provide a system of laws that are enforced equally for all. Without justice there can be no level playing field. Without equal justice America is but an empty promise. The best way to help the poor and underprivlidged is to ensure them equal protection under the law. To support orgnizations that work to level the playing field and keep it that way.

CHECK BOOKS AND BEDROOMS

Today I find myself politically perplexed.  The Republicans won’t stay out of my bedroom and the Democrats won’t stay out of my checkbook.  Socially I’m completely liberal.  Hell, I don’t care what anybody does as long as they don’t do it to me.  Don’t believe in abortion?  Don’t have one.  Gay people getting married?  Who cares!  Besides, why shouldn’t gays get married and become as miserable as most married heterosexuals?

Fiscally I’m pretty conservative.   It’s not that I mind paying taxes.  It’s just that I mind having those taxes used to do things better left to the private sector.  Or worse, have those tax dollars used to take away my personal freedom. Government is intent upon the redistribution of wealth and it’s tool is your tax dollars. 

Democracy, by its very nature, carries inside it the seeds of its own destruction.  Eventually a segment of the electorate realizes they can vote to “redistribute” other peoples money to themselves. Eventually that segment becomes a majority and soon more citizens are on the dole than on the job.  Eventually they economic system collapses.  The USA is near the tipping point right now.   

NAME DROPPING

Years ago I had several opportunities to talk with Ted Turner one on one.  While socially pretty liberal, he’s fiscally conservative and uses his money in numerous ways to benefit mankind.  He once told me that if the government took all his money and divided it up equally among all the people he’d soon have his money back in his pocket.  And so it is.  If you took all the money in the world and divided it up equally among all the people lin the world, within a few years it would find its way back in the hands of the rich.  Call it luck or skill or both. The bible says, “the poor will always be with us.”  To that I would add, “so will the rich always be with us.”

IGNORANCE HYPOCRISY OR BOTH? 

I have a VERY liberal friend, a retired college professor, who HATES corporations.  He considers them, along with  the wealthy people that  create those corporations, as evil, selfish, and down right mean.  Amazing.  Does he really think Ted Turner has his billions buried in a tin can or tucked under his mattress?  No matter where Ted invests his money, once invested HE AINT GOT IT ANYMORE. It’s out there somewhere.

Put you’re money in the bank, the bank loans it out to someone else.  T bills?  The government uses it to pay its bills or fund another entitlement program.  Wall Street?  The ultimate casino.  Amazingly, its the profits from the very corporations my liberal friend hates which fund his retirement account. The state has all his money in the Wall Street Casino which invests it in corporations. 

DOLLARS AND SENSE

Let’s talk about money.  I’m sure you view the lack of money as the single biggest obstacle to obtaining your freedom. Funny thing about money. How much is enough?  For a detailed examination of this question see Lee Eisenberg’s  “The Number. A Completely Different Way To Think About The Rest Of Your Life.”  A must read at any age if you care about having “enough money to someday retire.”

When you were in college or starting out on that first job you probably had far less money than you have today.   But were you somehow happier back then?  Did you have more fun back then?  Its because you were more FREE. The truth is you’ve probably taken that extra income and applied it to acquiring and maintaining things that don’t make you happy.  Things that don’t allow you to be free.  Things that Madison Avenue convinced you to buy. Remember that old cowboy’s advice. “Never buy anything you don’t need and can live without.” Or in the words of Chris Kristofferson, “Freedom ain’t worth nothin but it’s free.”

A WORD ABOUT MADISON AVENUE

 America is NOT winning the war with radical muslims.  While we arguably have the best technology and military on the planet, we simply can’t win a war of “ideas” with boots on the ground or drones in the air.  We can only win this war by changing hearts and minds.  And thats where Madison Avenue comes in.  Hey, they  convinced us to buy a kitchen device that turns twenty pounds of trash into twenty pounds of trash. It’s called a trash compactor.  And for years they tricked us into buying american cars which were far inferior to foreign cars.  Maybe we should turn them loose on the followers of Mohammed. This is a battle for hearts and minds.  Madison Avenues forte.

MONEY  WON’T MAKE YOU FREE.       After realizing that I alone had the ability to set myself free, the second most valuable thing I learned from Harry Browne had to do with money and it was this; money does not necessarily make you free but being free may be the key to making money. Working for someone else may make you a living but it will seldom make you rich.  And it will likely make you miserable in the process. ” Work your fingers to the bone and what do you get?  Boney fingers.”

LOOKING OUT FOR NUMBER ONE

Webster defines selfish as “concerned with your own interests, needs, and wishes.”  Aren’t we all?  But Webster goes on to add, “while ignoring those of others.”  Hey, let’s admit it.  We’re all pretty much concerned with our own interests, needs, and wishes.  In fact, being free implies the ability (and willingness) to fulfill your own interests, needs, and wishes. But that leads to problems.

YOU SELFISH BASTARD! 

In your personal quest to be free, to live your life in your own way, you may be seen by others as being selfish.  That should be a big red flag.  Here’s what they’re really saying– “It’s ok for me to impose my interests, needs, and wishes upon you.  But it’s not ok for you to do it to me.”   We constantly find our personal needs in conflict with those of other people.  We’re not being selfish.  WE’RE HANGING AROUND WITH THE WRONG PEOPLE!  Go out there and find people who already share your interests, needs, and wishes.  Suddenly, instead of being selfish, you’re being friends with people of like minds.  For more on this idea read my thoughts about “control” contained in the essay “Advice To Myself.”

YOUR HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENT

Well, that’s about it for now.  If any of this made sense I urge you to go to www.amazon.com and order these books:

How I Found Freedom In An Unfree World, by Harry Browne.

The Richest Man In Babylon, by George Clason.

Escape from Freedom, by Eric Fromm.

The Number, by Lee eisenberg.

Footsteps, by Larry Morgan. (Ok, I’m plugging my own book. I’m a shameless capitalist.) 

BE FREE TOO

My personal website, befrfeetoo.net has given me an opportunity to “give something back.”  To pass on something others might enjoy. I hope you’ll look over the other essays, enjoy the poems, browse through the pictures, and share them with your friends.  Since starting befreetoo in 2009 I’ve received thousands of emails.  I’ve been contacted by former friends with whom I had lost contact. I’ve received emails from people all over the world. I continue to correct typos, mis-spelled words, and technical flaws pointed out to me by people who actually took the time to read these pages, and my book Footsteps and were kind enough to send in comments.

I hope YOU will contact me or post a comment.  Anything posted goes only to me and is not made public.  Any email you send me remains confidential.  Your email address or any contact information will not be shared or sold. I welcome your feedback, positive or negative, and look forward to hearing from you. It may take time but I will respond.

THE THIRD  FORTUNE  COOKIE

Oh, I almost forgot.  That third fortune cookie said, “You have a great way with words.  Maybe you should write a book.”  I’m working on one.

ELM STREET

Thank’s for reading this collection of mostly other peoples ideas.  You are now at Elm Street.  I  hope you’re inspired  to turn left.  You’ll never regret the decision.  Email me when you get there.